i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Randomize
