he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
