found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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