So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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