He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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