it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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