come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize