another moral hangover. fuck.
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
