I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Randomize
