After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize