He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
she pinky promised me she was 18
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
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