Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
