If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize