you guys were way drunker than both of me
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
