Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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