we're chasing vodka with high fives
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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