somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
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