Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize