Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
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