Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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