he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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