We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
