marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Dicks are not precious.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
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