people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Randomize
