so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Randomize