o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
