After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
