Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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