Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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