when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize