arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
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