we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
