yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
My ass is underappreciated
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Randomize
