u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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