I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Randomize
