dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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