Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Randomize
