hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
