We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
