i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
