i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Randomize