Pregnant stripper...not hot.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
