my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
