Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize