dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
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