You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
