just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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