So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
