How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
