my sisters under your porch take her home
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
