I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
